Right, let’s get it over with. Oh no it isn’t and it’s behind you.

I’m doing that for both my sake and yours, to remove any temptation to pepper the blog post with panto puns throughout, and so that we can get to the crux of the matter.

Rumplestiltskin from The Big Tiny theatre company is brilliant. It’s funny, warm, wicked, immersive and everything you’d want from panto and deserve in these dark (figuratively and literally) days.

Deep in the forest in the foothills of the Alps lies the Bavarian town of Lieblingsberg, the town where everyone falls in love. Only they don’t… At least nobody has since Cupid nipped out to the shops twenty years ago.

Whilst love has been away, a new magical creature has settled in Lieblingsberg… A bitter, twisted little man who lives underneath the haunted hollow tree with the cobwebs and spiders and things that go bump in the night. The townsfolk have a name for him: Rumpelstiltskin. And he wants to make a deal.

Rumplestiltskin is made ‘nose to tail in Manchester, by Mancunians for Mancunians’ (and hopefully honorary mancunians), and I can say it definitely carries that manc warmth and wit. With customary jibes at Piccadilly Gardens and cheeky digs at Salfordians, the audience is made to feel right at home.

Rumpy stiltz (we’re calling it that going forward as everytime I type out its full name, I have to go back and correct it as there are ‘i’s, ‘l’s and ‘t’s all over the flipping place – I’m typing all the right letters, but not necessarily in the right order, to paraphrase the great Eric Morecambe), has a small cast, a simple set and nowhere to hide, meaning that the performances and script have to be spot on. And spot on they are.

With song and dance (and special shout out to Maria (aka Ikea), Shannon Farrell, and Rumpy Stiltz, Lewys Taylor, for their beautiful voices), with great support from the Juvenile Chorus dancers in costumes straight out of The Sound of Music, this is a sparky, joyful, all-round variety showcase of entertainment and talent.

Let us now turn to our Master of Ceremonies, hostess with the mostess and the one who grabs us by the hand and takes us on this journey of love, Cupid, played by Arti Mirwani-Daltry. Sporting a wig that defies gravity, this is a Cupid not only armed with a bow and arrow of amore, but bitingly funny lines and asides, which set the tone for the show from the off.

In fact, the comedy spoils are shared throughout the cast, with every character bringing their own special brand of extra to proceedings. Our Prince, Josh Radcliffe, hams it up beautifully bringing the cheese along the way with knowing looks and asides thrown throughout, and a donning of regal garb which puts the Prince (RIP) in Disney Prince (with a touch of 3 stripe Adidas thrown in).

Badges, his faithful friend employee, brought to life by Harry Gascoigne, lights up the stage (and in fact all areas of the theatre, getting his steps in as he ran up and down), and perfectly fulfilled the role of sweet dependable, endearingly cheeky and chirpy, friend to the audience and leader of communal sing-a-longs and scary sequences in the woods (hedgehogs are terrifying to me now).

And every good wholesome hero requires a puppetry partner in crime. My go-to example of this was always Philly Schofe and Gordon, but lets skip over that and bring out Andy Crane and Edd. Well our Badges is coupled up with his adopted dog, Binbags whose secret presence leads to him residing in a bin (shout-out to Oscar the Grouch). Cue a panto-tastic sequence of audience warnings as we aide and abet this clandestine state of affairs and help to prevent his discovery.

And now, as the old adage goes, there is nothing like a Dame. And ladies and gentlemen, stepping into the silly costumes, wacky wigs and bringing the snarky, cheeky, double-entendre laden lines is our very own Winnie the Warden, brought to life by Will Cousins. Every panto has a moment or two of immersing audience members into the magic and mayhem, and Winnie fulfilled the brief perfectly, putting the fear of god into one audience member, by making them the object of her desires (well done James, Sir James) throughout the show.

where are you from James?

Sale.

Sorry?

Sale.

No I heard you, I’m just sorry.

Now, and this is really interesting and explains a lot of how on point this show is as the perfect panto, is that writer Ben Richards clearly lives and breathes panto as an art and craft. I’m fascinated to learn that he is currently researching contemporary British panto for a PhD. To my mind, this will essentially lead to the title of Doctor of Panto and I’m here for it. In fact, set down your laptop and research Ben, I’m giving you that crown already after seeing the show.

As all good pantos do, Rumpy Stiltz provides the perfect pitch of all round family fun for all ages, whilst slipping in a cheekly line or two for the adults below the radar. It’s quite simply two hours of fun.

Whilst the actual Rumpy Stiltz brings the boos and evil intent (the older you get, the more sinister the plot-lines hit to be honest…), Maria the sweetness and light in the shape of our princess, and the ensemble as a whole the true silly spirit of panto, this is a show which is feel-good, funny and just a right good laugh.

And at this point I also want to point out the ‘Pinch’ scheme Contact promotes with lower prices for those feeling the pinch. No questions asked. If you haven’t discovered Contact on Oxford Road, I sincerely suggest you do – it’s a brilliant venue, with a lovely little bar and a whole host of lovely people who work there.

Rumplestiltskin is on until 31 December, you can find more information and details at https://contactmcr.com/events/rumpelstiltskin

Read more about The Big Tiny at https://www.thebigtiny.co.uk/

And, definitely head to Ben Richards’ blog at https://thepantoblog.blogspot.com/

The End.

(Oh no it isn’t).

It is.